The first time I blew Daddy it was in the dryer room after Mommy had gone to work. It was spontaneous, awkward, repetetive and embarrassing. I felt so stupid afterwards, like he thought I was worthless and pathetic. I’d fantasised for so long about how good it would feel to finally suck him off, and when I did, I did such a terrible job I thought he’d forget it and never want me again.
I was so upset, I didn’t sleep all night, but I made a plan.
Early the next morning, I dressed up in my sexiest lingerie, fishnets, makeup, heels. I did my hair. I turned my body into the whore body I knew he wanted. As the sun came up, I stared at myself in the mirror, obsessing over every detail. When I heard the front door close and watched through the curtain as my Mom drove away, I shouted downstairs to him, telling him to come up to my room.
When he opened my bedroom door I was on my knees in front of him, looking up with those pleading eyes. I told him I was his baby slut daughter, that he could do anything he wanted to me and that he owned me completely. I begged him to unzip his trousers and give me a second chance.